A Little Less Talk, A Lot More Action (no pun intended, or is it...)

Scholar, actor and author Hill Harper launched his third book, The Conversation: How Black Men and Women Can Build Loving, Trusting Relationships, last week. The tiltle of the book speaks for itself. But the question is, how can this happen? Is it too far-fetched to believe we can mend the broken dynamic in relationships in our community?

Couples like President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama give people like me hope (no pun intended) that it still exists today: black love. Movies like some of my all-time faves Brown Sugar and Love Jones portray that fantasy that so many of us can't grasp, but desire and yearn for it to be our reality. Why can't we grasp it? Perhaps it's because we've never experienced it, or we've never seen it.

But, the sad truth is our community, our family, is indeed hurting. And that hurt transcends into our relationships with each other: our children, our parents, our friends and this case, our lovers and soulmates. So, how can we imulate something we can't see or touch? I believe some of the greatest teachers in life are examples, and the best ones are through experiences.

I didn't write this blog to provide answers because to be honest, I don't have any. I, like Hill, want to start (or continue if you will) a dialogue about this topic. I speak from the point-of-view as a young, successful, talented, spiritual, sophisticated and beautiful black lady who worries about her brothers and sisters. I speak as someone who wants to know how more action can be implemented into all this "conversation"...

The Infamous Age-Old Question: Does Life Imitate Art or Does Art Imitate Life?

I can go in circles about the question of whether or not life imitates art or vice versa, but I won't. Just for tonight, I decide to stop straddling the fence and actually pick a side. And perhaps I'll stick with it.

After pondering over this, I've come to the conclusion that art DEFINITELY imitates life. Why you ask? Think about it. Almost every book and movie script is derived from an idea, a thought. Where? In someone's mind. Therefore, these ideas (with some fiction work, perhaps some exaggerations) form into creative pieces of work (aka art).

Here's a perfect example. The movie Brown Sugar is one of my all-time favorite movies and love stories. I think it's fair to say it's on the list under "good movies" for several people. I mean, it's not an Oscar-winning film, but it's an age-old love story about how two best friends grow up together and fall in love with each other (if you haven't seen the movie, it's a great one!). How many people can identify with that? I know several who do and would dare say there are many more out there. Sanaa Lathan and Taye Diggs portrayed that unidentifying love between two people that transcended relationships/engagements (and even a marriage).

It's virtually the same scenario in My Best Friend's Wedding or Made of Honor, except there's a different ending. Who couldn't empathize with Julia Roberts' or Patrick Dempsey's characters, the desperate best friend who would stop at nothing to win back who they thought were their one true love?

You've gotta love a good, old-fashioned love story that gives you hope that it could happen to you. The point is these movies started out as ideas (and possible experiences) from someone. What's funny is that this topic is the subject of many more films, books and songs. So, it has to be something that many people identify with on some level (whether they've experienced it or know someone who did).

The same can go for an array of topics. I can see the validity in the other argument that life imitates art, but for now, I'll stick on this side of the debate.