Taking Myself Out of the Freezer

A few weeks ago, I went on vacation with my sister and cousin for our First Annual Girls' Weekend. We decided to retreat in Atlanta aka ''Hotlanta" and "ATL". We haven't spent any length of time in the city prior to the trip, so we were all curious to see what all the hype was about and were to eager to spend some well-deserved time away from work and responsibilities. It was time to relax, relate and release (and had great times doing it!). Little did I know, it was also time to reflect.

While I was there, I met with a colleague (who's turned into a friend along the way) who is both a psychologist and relationship expert in Atlanta. I consulted with him on yet another article I'm writing about intimate relationships between my brothas and sistas in our community (which still intrigues me, but I digress). *I can't divulge the deets of this article yet because it's a current project I'm writing, but deets to follow soon - my apologies for the tease.*

It turns out in the course of retrieving information for my article over the two-hour lunch meeting, I was subconsciously forced to look at my own situation in the romance department, or shall I say a lack thereof.

I can honestly say at 27 years old, I've yet to fall in love. It's interesting because most would describe me as a hopeless romantic and would be correct. I'm one who loves love. I want to fall in love. I'm a sap, an idealist. Yet, I overanalyze EVERYTHING, and my brain gets in the way of what my heart feels. Some say it's smart to play it safe. But my friend told me, "When it comes to love, you can't get what you want based on fear."

I subconsciously (and consciously) wait for that "one". The man who's going to be everything to me. Best friend. Lover. Partner. Confidante. Is that too unrealistic? Perhaps. But, as I mentioned in previous blogs, I refuse to settle. But, I don't think it's about settling. My sister says I need to make myself more available and put myself out there on the scene. So, the question is: How do I do that?

My friend mentioned how I may be "in the freezer"...and it made sense! I'm at a place where I can be preserved, but I have to admit, it's a bit cold in there. And we all know what happens to things that stay in the freezer too long - they get freezer-burned (which is an oxymoron - but it does happen, especially to meat!)!

I'll be a year older in my late 20s in July, and I'm forced to think about my future. As I progress in my career, who I want to spend my future with is in the back of my mind. Yet, I must focus on my present and how the experiences today will shape my future. Perhaps, I should listen more to my heart. Whatever the case, it's summertime and it's the season in my life to thaw out.